I'm just preparing myself
Monday, November 15, 2010
I'm beginning to feel like I'm talking to myself on here. People always tell me that they read my blogs, but no one comments and I haven't had a new follower since day one. I can tell you that one reason for that is that most of the blogs I follow are the ones that I cannot yet relate to: the stay-at-home, crafty, money-saving, photographer, mommy blogs. What interest do they have in a girl like me? I'm kind of in limbo right now. I've tried the whole money-saving thing and as I mentioned before, I really stink at balancing. I'm not yet a mom, I actually have to go to work, and try to become a photographer on the side. I love reading the blogs that I read because I have learned a lot and I can honestly say that had it not been for following the blogs that I follow, I would never had started clipping coupons, became interested in photography, or have a strong opinion for breast-feeding (and cloth diapers and baby-wearing!).
Who am I you might ask? A 22-year old that is engaged and planning a wedding for next July. I am still living at home, but mostly buy my own groceries so I attempt to save as much money as I can in the process. I do not have kids, but want a handful of them ASAP and when I do, I will try with all I have to solely breast-feed. I would like to call myself a professional photographer but the truth is that I haven't even found myself or my voice. Kinda funny that I'm reading the blogs that I am, huh? No, I am not trying to become something that I'm not but I don't think you have an idea how badly I want to be at the stage in my life where I can say I am a stay-at-home mom that only breast feeds, uses cloth diapers, and carries my baby in a sling while I am balancing blogging, photography, and loving my husband with my entire heart. I'm just preparing myself. ;)
Posted byAshley C. at 3:40 PM Post a comment (1) Love Notes
Labels: marriage, me, photography, struggles
While you're away, the thieves will play
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
. . . I came home and she was right, some of my belongings were dumped on my bed and floor while others remained untouched. Me and Josh's laptops, the wii, the PS3, and some controllers were all gone. I couldn't help but kneel on the side of my bed and cry out loud. How could someone do this? Mom was downstairs talking to the insurance company on the phone and Lowell was looking around for more things to add to that awfully long list . . .
I had plans yesterday to babysit a couple towns over and mom and Lowell had off of work because mom had to get dental surgery. I was reminding mom to watch out for the UPS guy to drop off my cell phone (different story, different day!) and waited around as long as I could for him. I was eager to babysit because I could practice my so-called photography skills on the kids; I grabbed my camera bag and headed out the door before I was late. I got to the house where I was babysitting at about 12:45. Mom called that house at about 2:45, on the other end mom was speaking frantically,
"Ashley? Oh, my gosh, when are you going to be home?! Someone broke into our house while we were gone!"
Wait, are you serious?! How the heck did they get in past the dogs?
"They sliced through the kitchen window. There's things dumped all over your room. I need to know what's missing."
Can you go in my room and tell me if some things are there? Is my laptop, wii, or Josh's bags missing?
"None, of that is here. How many bags did Josh have? Please tell me you have your camera with you!"
Oh, my freaking goodness! My laptop is gone? Josh had 3 bags there, how many did they take?!
"There's only one here."
Okay, let me call and see when they'll be home.
I could not contain myself; I just started bawling. My laptop is gone? Every picture of me and Josh from day one is on there. Every picture I have ever taken of Andrew is on there. All the pictures from the family reunion and last weekend are on there. All of my music, schoolwork, resume, is on there. What about Josh's computer? Any picture that I've ever taken is copied on his computer. All of his important documents and computer-programming work are on there. Fortunately, the kids' parents would be home in 30 minutes. Let me tell you, that was probably one of the longest 30 minutes of my life. I could not wait to get home, survey my belongings and be able to talk to Josh.
I came home and she was right, some of my belongings were dumped on my bed and floor while others remained untouched. Me and Josh's laptops, the wii, the PS3, and some controllers were all gone. I couldn't help but kneel on the side of my bed and cry out loud. How could someone do this? Mom was downstairs talking to the insurance company on the phone and Lowell was looking around for more things to add to that awfully long list. Mom was saddened by her jewelry being gone since it was left for her when her mom passed away. Her credit cards and money, laptop, camera, wedding ring, and some other valuable things were gone. Things that could not be recovered. I just could not believe that all of my pictures had been stolen from me. After I gathered myself, it was my turn to make several phone calls. I had to call and suspend my cell phone line, call Dell and gather information and report 3 stolen laptops, call my cell phone insurance company and report a stolen replacement cell phone, and call UPS to see if my package was delivered. I was able to take care of all of that; my phone got suspended, the stolen phone fee was waived, I got the tag numbers for all laptops, and my package would be delivered tomorrow.
As I was cleaning up my room, my mom yelled to me and my step dad, "Guys! Come look what's in my garbage!" We both ran downstairs and in the garbage was one of Josh's laptop bags stuffed with the cheapest of all of the jewelry. We called the cops and they came to the house, took the bag and did fingerprints again. After that, I was finally able to get a hold of Josh and felt so comfortable just letting all of my fear, doubts, and anger out. The moment he said, "Baby, what's done is done. We still have each other and our families. Any picture that was worth showing off is on Facebook anyway. Plus, I planned on getting you a new Mac anyway." Just hearing him speak so calmly with no ounce of worry in his voice dried my tears up quicker than anything else could have. He was right. What's done is done, crying is not going to get me anywhere. I still had my Lover, my Jive, my best friend and any amount of my missing belongings could not come close to what he meant to me; that's all that mattered in that moment.
Today is a new day, but the fears of yesterday still reside in our home. Although Josh stayed with me last night, I could not fall asleep because I just kept replaying the incident in my mind. I wonder what he looked like. I wonder if the dogs went crazy. I wonder how long he was in our house. I wonder what else he took that I/we didn't notice. I wonder who's room he went in first. I wonder if we've seen him in passing before. I wonder what else he saw that he wanted. But most of all, I wonder when he'll decide to come back. Our central air is getting fixed today (after 3 weeks of heck!), so once all of the windows are shut and locked, hopefully he will not try getting in. It's very, very sad when you've got to walk around your own home with caution, wondering if someone is walking around it with you; when you have to think twice about leaving something out or hiding it before leaving; when you have to decide what lock to install on your bedroom door, not in fear of someone in the house getting in, but in fear of someone who doesn't even belong in the house getting in. I feel so violated knowing that someone came into our home, went through our belongings, things we've all worked so hard to buy, and decided what they wanted to claim as their own. It's a sick thing knowing that someone was in my room, going through my belongings, and taking things that have no intrinsic value to them. Their hands touched my door knob, my bed, and their fingers filed through my dresser drawers and they decided what they wanted of mine. Now, my job is to research home security options, call around to the local pawn shops, and I guess it wouldn't hurt to research a new Mac. ;-]
I guess it's lessons like these that make us remember what matters most to us. :-] I'll keep you posted on any further information or findings we come across.
Posted byAshley C. at 9:44 AM Post a comment (1) Love Notes
Labels: family, finances, lesson learned, me, struggles, summer
An at home Spring break
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
I know, I'm a little late on writing this, but hey, better late than never, right? :-] I shared with you that Josh I were going to spend some of the weekend in Chicago for my birthday and an "at home Spring break." These are some of the views from our 17th floor room. It was so beautiful! We had a corner room, so 2 of our walls were basically made up of windows. Big windows. While we were looking out of the windows, we were spying on people in other buildings. We found a girl that we named Tracy. She should feel special because we dedicated about 30 minutes to watching her. Creepy? Yeah, I thought so, too. BUT, she had curtains and was walking around in her underwear, bra, and at one point, her towel and she never pulled the curtains . . .so. haha! It was fun.
Posted byAshley C. at 10:19 AM Post a comment (1) Love Notes
Labels: Josh, me, relaxing, Spring, vacation
Happy birthday to me!
Friday, March 19, 2010
I must admit that this is probably one of the best birthdays I have had! This is right up there with Josh and me celebrating in Orlando last year. There have been so many happy and rich moments that I deeply appreciate.
This morning, me and mom went out to breakfast, which was great because we never do anything like that. And because it was just us two, there weren't any distractions and we could just talk and have fun together. Afterwards, we decided that this was something that we needed to do more regularly. :-]
Guess who told me happy birthday via Facebook?! Karen Kingsbury! Yes, the Karen Kingsbury!!! :-] I am sooo star-struck and it really means a lot that she took the time out to write a little message on my wall. Also, one of my favorite bloggers, Drea had her baby today! She also took the time during her strong contractions to wish me a happy birthday and let me know that me and the little one might have to share today! I cannot wait to see the pictures!
When I got to work, I had a card, cake, roses and balloons from some of the girls. Krissy even put, "Happy birthday Ashley" on our sign outside. They are so sweet and really spoiled me. :-]
While writing this, I had another dozen of roses and some balloons delivered to me from my Lover. This time, they were not in a box! ;-] They are so beautiful.
And, finally, my mom just stopped in to deliver my birthday gift . . . a beautfil diamond heart necklace. :-] Aaahh, I love this day.
Tonight after work, Josh and I are heading down to Chicago to have dinner at Navy Pier and stay at the Hard Rock Hotel. And tomorrow, we are going to grab lunch and spend the day at the Shedd Aquarium. I am really excited because it will be just us two spending some quality time together. :-] Another highlight is that New Moon comes out tomorrow! Yay! :-]
Posted byAshley C. at 2:12 PM 0 Love Notes
